"Labor Laws and Fictional Characters"

This toothfairy thing is already ticking me off. When he lost his first tooth he bounded down the stairs all proud of himself. He walked right over to me and said 'I lost my tooth.' and I said 'No you didn't, nice try.'



You see, my son is constantly looking for what he refers to as 'The Ultimate Prank'. So I simply assumed that this was another try like putting ice down my pants or hiding a very large, very fake spider in my shower.



"No Mom, I did. I lost it. See?"



And I looked down and saw a little white tooth in his tiny little fingers and I FREAKED out.



"Oh my gosh! This isn't supposed to happen. Are you okay? Did you fall down the stairs? Did someone punch you? Wait...WAIT DID YOU KNOCK THIS OUT YOURSELF?



You're a baby!! This isn't supposed to happen to you!?!?!?"



And I'm screaming hysterically because I've never heard of a 5 year old losing a tooth and he starts getting scared and screams



"PUT IT BACK IN! Put it back in... Oh why is this happening? Oh NO!" And we are crying and holding each other like it's the end of days.



This brings my husband down the stairs from whatever music he was illegaly downloading to be super dad asking 'Whats wrong, what's wrong?'



We cried and showed him the tooth and he said 'He's five years old. He's gonna lose teeth. There's nothing wrong.' Then he showed me on the internet how it's perfectly normal for a 5 year old to lose a first tooth.



It was dramatic enough that I didn't think about this whole 'under the pillow monetary donation' deal until well after 2 am that night. I went to my wallet and found $10. Not ten singles. Not even 2 fives. Just $10.00.



So I wrote him a nice card from the toothfairy explaining that she didn't have time to stop for change so he was going to get the whole $10.00 but next time it would be less and of course Congratulations on losing his first tooth and something in there about remembering to put the toilet seat down.



2 months later- in a less dramatic fashion, he loses his second tooth. That night, I forgot about the toothfairy all together and he wakes up to ask where his tooth cash is.



Without missing a beat, I say, "Union Labor Laws prohibit the Tooth Fairy from working on Saturday nights but she should be around tomorrow night. She's definitely clocking in for Sunday"